Kriminelle betraktninger

Med kvinnedagen trygt lagt bak oss og hverdagen behørig tilbake på plass, er tiden inne for å bringe følgende betraktning rundt forskjellen kjønnene i mellom, ført i pennen av den vise sosiolog P.G. Wodehouse.

A Solitary Triumph
[Statistics show that the number of criminal women is considerably less in proportion than that of male criminals.]

OH, the progress of Woman has really been vast
Since Civilization began.
She's usurped all the qualities which in the past
Were reckoned peculiar to Man.
She can score with a bat, use a rod or a cue;
Her tennis and golf are sublime.
Her aim with a gun is uncommonly true,
But Man beats her hollow at crime.

The strings to her bow are both varied and quaint;
There are maids who can work with the pen,
There are maids who can handle the palette and paint
With a skill that's not given to men.
There are ladies who preach, lady doctors there are,
MPs will be ladies in time,
And ladies, I hear, practise now at the Bar --
But Man holds the record for crime.

So it's hey for the jemmy, and ho for the drill,
And hurrah for the skeleton keys.
Oh, to burgle a house or to rifle a till!
I am more than her equal at these.
She may beat me at home, she may beat me afield;
In her way I admit she is prime.
But one palm at least I compel her to yield:
I can give her a lesson in crime.